This Are My Confessions, Bro!

[Joaquin Souberbielle]

So the plan at first was to vote for Frederique on the first tribal council, but me and Jen were talking and it wasn't fair to vote for her over Fatima and Lisi. She seems like she really wants to stay in the game, unlike the other two who I feel like are basically throwing the towel just because a vote didn't go their way. Also, she's really good at challenges and we're gonna need that if we want the four of us (me, Jen, Cochran and Kat) to stay together. I'm also afraid that Fatima and Lisi would throw the challenge just to fuck us up, so better safe than sorry. I know Frederique is a bigger threat than those two, but she has been nothing but nice to me and I would feel really bad screwing her over like that (I know I ended up doing that exact thing to Lisi and I feel really bad about it). I know I may sometimes come up as a bitch, but I promise you I'm not that awful in real life

[Joaquin Souberbielle]

I know it's still to early in the game, but I recently made a F2 deal with Jen and I don't plan to break it anytime soon. She's one of, if not the person I trust the most in this game. She's always cussing people out and getting really personal, which is great for me if I make the F2 with her because people will most like not vote for her. Also, I really don't think she has any ties with her old tribe so she'll be loyal to me.

Plus, who doesn't want to be working with someone like this.

[Joaquin Souberbielle]

So the worst case scenario happened, we lost the challenge and now we have to pick one of us off. The first vote should be easy, as much as I like Frederique she has to go. Now the second vote is where things get trickier, we basically have Cochran and Jen begging at me and Kat to keep them. Kat seems to really like Cochran, but I was doing everything I could to sway Kat to vote for Cochran instean of Jen because I trust her more. Cochran seems to be really close with Kat, even offering her a F2 deal (or that's what she told me) so I need to cut that to have a chance. After talking for a while Kat finally agreed on saving Jen instead.

[Joaquin Souberbielle]

So we just got out of tribal devastated after having to vote out Cochran and we were all expecting to merge at this round. But surprise, we're not!

There's no if and buts right now, we HAVE to win this challenge not only to stay alive, but to diminish the other tribe's numbers. Right now they have a six-person advantage which is huge in this game. To be honest this is a blessing in disguise, well if we actually win this challenge. If we were to merge this round we would have a huge disadvantage numbers wise and would probably have no chance of surviving the merge anyways. If we end up going to tribal though I think I'm in a pretty nice spot because I believe I have both Jen and Kat wrapped around my finger, but I really don't want to have to choose between them. If we have to vote out two people I'll probably save the one easiest to beat on a tie-breaker challenge, which I think is Jen. I don't know, we'll see what happens. 

[Joaquin Souberbielle]

After losing three immunity challenges in a row and having to vote out 6 people we finally won our first immunity since the merge!!!!

Kat and Jen completely demolished the competition. I have a feeling that the people from Rakvere didn't even try for this challenge, but even if they gave it their all I still think Kat and Jen would have won it for us. They probably felt threatened with the people from Parnu joining together so maybe they threw it to get rid of two of us. This is kind of a strange feeling, I haven't had to not vote out someone in a long time. 



It's been a long time coming but we're finally merging after this round. We're gonna have to do a lot of scrambling though because I feel like people are gonna come after us. They already know each other so we'll be easy to vote off. I completely suck at this challenges unless is some type of slider puzzler so I can't count on immunity come the merge. If I have to wreak havoc and stir the pot to stay a little longer that's exactly what I'll do. 

[Joaquin Souberbielle]

I was so close to winning that immunity necklace but I guess it wasn't meant to be. After all, Jen ended up giving it up for Grant and he ended up doing the same for Sean. Before we merged Jen warned me about Nikki being a little shady, but man she is worst than she described. She was in a good position yet she still felt the need to throw deals around to EVERYONE. She wasn't our initial target but now we want her head on a platter. She have been saying to Priya, Gina and Grant that we have been trying to get one of them out, which couldn't be any further form the truth. Grant is already weary of her and promised to stick with us, but the other two don't seem that bright. I don't want to tell them two that we're voting for Nikki because it's possible that Priya has an idol and she may play it on Nikki. Our plan is to try and throw Nikki under the bus on the revote (if the people saying they are voting for Nikki are telling the truth) and hope one of Priya and Gina changes their vote. If not then I'll gladly draw rocks, because I know that if I don't take this risk I'm gonna go to Ponderosa real soon. 

[Joaquin Souberbielle]

The witch is finally gone and I couldn't be any more happier. GinaMaria and Priya said that they were voting for Nikki with us, but the bitches went back on their word. They pretty much just sealed their fates in the game. And who the fuck voted for Jen anyways, such a stupid move. Until they pull some shenanigans I should be safe for the next couple of rounds, but I still want that immunity necklace around my neck because I'm greedy like that. 

[Joaquin Souberbielle]

I think i accomplished what I was trying to do. I got a decent score, I'm sure not enough for the win, but I also tried it which makes it seem like I don't feel secure in the game. I was trying to go for a little more, but I ended up falling asleep for like 5 minutes.

[Joaquin Souberbielle]

Fuuuuckkkkk, Jen and Kat had a falling out today and now they're gunning for each other. I'm so pissed off because now I have to choose between them and no matter what one of them is gonna be pissed off smat me. Kat really wants me to vote for Cyndi tonight so we have the numbers to take out Jen next round, and now Jen wants me to vote for Priya to do the same to Kat. I honestly don't know what the hell to do. This is the hardest decision I've ever had to make on one of this games because I love both of them, but ultimately this is a game and I can't be playing with emotions. But gosh this sucks

[Joaquin Souberbielle]

Ugh, so it looks like I'm the deciding vote tonight. Kat, GM, Grant and Priya are voting for Cyndi while the other four are voting for Priya. Personally I want to vote for Priya, but Kat is gonna be upset with me since we have voted the same way till the first tribal, but I know I have a better shot siding with Jen and the others. I literally haven't been this stressed out since finals last semester. I really hope I make the best decision tonight.

[Joaquin Souberbielle]

This day has been the absolute worst, I can't believe everything went down like that. I'm so pissed off because I wanted Priya to go, but I figured we wouldn't have enought votes to do it, but of course I was wrong. Jen is really upset with me now. She's telling me now that we're good but I just don't thinks she trusts me anymore, which I completely understand. I was her biggest ally in this game and had a F2 deal with her, but I had the same thing with Kat.

Now, I'm getting so annoyed at Kat and Grant. They started questioning where my loyalties lied when I put my neck in the chopping block for them two. They really thought I voted for Priya instead of Cyndi. So right now I have both sides of the house mad at me. I kinda understand because I also never expected GinaMaria to turn on us, but if I'm telling you I voted for Cyndi then fucking believe me, I have no reason to be lying.

Colin and I have been talking recently and I think we're on the same page about Kat and Jen being huge threats. Jen has pissed off a lot of people, but she has also been calling all the shots in the house, while Kat is pretty much loved by everyone. He suggested maybe joining forces with Cyndi and GM to get both of them out of the game, which is actually what I wanted to do. Now the thing is convincing them two to work with us since Jen just saved their butts. If they were smart they would agree to do it. I feel bad turning on Jen, but if she's gonna be mad at me at least I'll give her a reason to be. 

[Joaquin Souberbielle]

This tribal definitely has me on the edge of my seat. People have said before that they want Kat gone, but you never know. They could gun against me since I already have a vote cast against me. I'm glad that I have that double vote, but I still don't feel safe.

[Joaquin Souberbielle]

This people have been way too silent today, so I'm definitely expecting to get the boot tonight, especially since I already have a vote cast against me. If Jen votes me out I'm gonna be so pissed, especially after giving me so much shit for voting for Priya. Let's wait and see what happens.!

[Joaquin Souberbielle]

So Jen was pissed at me last round because I lied to her about the Priya vote, which I didn't even lie about to her, and now she does the same thing to me. I never even gave her false hope, I told her that I was still trying to decide if I wanted to go with Kat or with Jen. Jen told me last night that she was gonna vote for Sean because he wasn't thay active and he was a liability. I knew she was lying to me because minutes before that she was set on voting for Kat, so that's why I decided to change my vote for GinaMarie instead. She is a doll, but she has made it very clear that her and Cyndi are realy tighy, and we can't have power duos at this point. Now we only need Sean to stick with us next round because Cyndi has the nullifier and if Sean flips to their side, one of me, Grant or Kat is going home.

[Joaquin Souberbielle]

So I wake up this morning and what do I see on my AIM? Jen bitching about how she can't still believe I chose Kat over her. I really loved the girl, but she has become really bossy and self-centered lately, all she cares about is herself. So I decided to tell her how I feel and she completely flipped on me about how I was so up Kat's ass and how stupid I was for deciding to go with Kat. Of course I'm gonna side with Kat, because she doesn't treat me like shit like Jen does. I actually felt bad when I voted for Priya instead, but I apologized for it and admitted that it was a mistake on my part. That said, I don't need to be reminded 24/7 about how I'm a backstabber and how stupid I am. I bit my tongue for so long but I won't let her walk all over me. She told me to vote for Sean this round and now she's pissed at me for not telling her to not vote for Kat (yes I am as confused as you guys are). It was obvious that she was lying straight to my face, who in their right mind would want Sean to go. Now she won't even speak to me, which is really petty from her part because I was just telling her how I feel. Yes, I may have adressed it a little harshly, but I don't regret anything I said. I may have lost her jury vote, but honestly I have way more important things to worry about than that. We should have just kept Cochran instead of her. Ok rant over, I'm just so mad right now.